Fire 'em
He's devoted his summer and an army of bulldozers to this. They ripped down the trees and plowed inches into the dirt, scraping the whole thing raw, so that not even a wisp of grass could still be alive, gutting the hill and taking 'clearcutting' to a level that is just one unstable molecule short of salting the earth.
So, understand, I already think this neighbour is a Richard, but then he decided there's only one reasonable way to get rid of acres and acres of brush piles that are three or four stories high.
Burn 'em.
All at once, unsupervised, and you sure don't need to even bother telling the fire department or the forestry guys or anything.
Between my green nature and my severe asthma, you can guess my level of delight.
We've all tried calling the fire department, but the fire department tells us they won't come look unless one of our houses catch fire. We have tried explaining that this fire is huge, and there's all this woods stuff, and yet very little of it between this fire and us, but they are unmoved. Except, I think they are resenting all these dang phone calls. Anyone with half a working brain cell who drives through sees this huge whack of flames, better known as a forest fire, and dials 911. Expecting someone will come and put it out. How silly of them.
Surprisingly, my other neighbours are somewhat irked too. Although, it's more like, if thoughts could murder, this guy would be on fire like he'd gone to the Prom with Carrie.
He's been burning for several days now, and the fire last night was even bigger than the others. It's sunny today, I think, but there's so much smoke outside that it looks like Victorian London. The wind is technically blowing away from me, thank all, but I can still barely breathe--locked up tight in my house, well dosed on asthma meds, and with two HEPA filters running on high.
I took some pictures last night. Quick snaps from my door, when the fire was low.
It would be pretty, if it wasn't so horrible.
The whole horizon was fire.
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